Thankful

I find this post ironic because about 15 minutes ago I was heck bent on venting and giving up on life. And then I stopped, said a sweet prayer and read some posts about how thankful everyone is. Ah, perspective.

As much as I wanted to rant and rave about the stresses of my life, I realized how blessed I truly am and how thankful I should be that I can even sit here and type this.

This year has been quite a ride to say the least. But I am ever thankful for:

My love, who I get to marry in 10 short days. Seriously love this man with all my heart.

The sweet baby bean growing inside my belly. Yes, little Evie, you are a blessing. I worry about you everyday and cannot wait to meet you. We are almost half way there!

My wonderful new job and co-workers. I kinda hit the work jackpot. I am challenged, respected, and supported everyday. Despite the drive that can get in the way every once in a while, the job makes it worth it.

My supportive friends. I would not be here without the love and support of those around me who constantly raise me up and remind me that He is good and He provides. Its truly takes a village to raise a child and I have the best village around.

So, today I choose to make the best of what wonderful gifts I have been bestowed and be thankful for the many blessings in life.

Happy Monday

It's Monday, and I am back from Orlando. A recap will come tomorrow. Happy Thanksgiving week ya'll!

Hump Day/Bump Day

Its my Friday of sorts today since I leave for Orlando and our firm retreat tomorrow. But today, its another day, another dollar, but lots of sunshine!

And its time for a little bump update.

ignore my work bathroom

How far along: 18 1/2 weeks!

Baby size: Sweet potato

Weight gain: 7-8 pounds, I think

Stretch marks: Nothing yet

Sleep: No. I cannot get comfortable for the life of me.

Gender: Girl. Evelyn Ray

Movement: Not unless you count digestion

Looking forward to: The wedding being over so I can move on to baby,

Food cravings: Not really hungry as of late. Although I feel the need to drink milk more these days.

What I miss: Real Clothes that fit.

Workouts: Still trying to get in 4 a week. I am not running on the treadmill anymore, just do not have the energy, but 30 minutes of elliptical or uphill walking followed my weight training.

Things that suck: Too big for regular clothes, not big enough for maternity clothes.... and trying to pack for a firmwide retreat that requires numerous outfit changes. I'm just in that awkward in-between stage. Also, tights. I love them, but man I had to get some maternity ones and just let them be big because my regs were cutting off my circulation.

Things that don't suck: Having a group of girlfriends pregnant with you all at the same time and having friends who have just been there. They are my rock, go-to and support.

How Do You Fight?

One of things le  guy and I are doing to prepare for marriage is to go through pre-marital counseling. We choose to do it through our church and we are paired with a mentor couple. We just happen to love this couple, so the process has been fun. This week we discussed fighting. Ok, communication more precisely,  but really it was how do you fight?

Le guy and I could not be more polar opposite when it comes to this topic. I mean I blog... I communicate. I am one with the words of my soul. I'm mad, you know it, sad you see it, stressed you feel it. He, on the other hand, is not so umm extroverted.

He is quiet, reserved, holds things in and internalizes them. In an argument, we becomes turtle man, kid you not his words not mine. I become the lioness hear my roar. As you can imagine this not bode well for resolving things in our world.

But what we learned is that we both want to accomplish the same goal, to resolve the conflict, but what drives our methods stems from learned traits. I learned to fight as kid to get what you want. He learned to think things through. I think I need to be louder to be heard and he wants to avoid saying the wrong things so he takes time to put his thoughts in order.

I'm sure so man of you can relate to one side or the other. However, the important thing to see is that neither of us is right or wrong. We are simply reacting how we feel will accomplish the end goal most effectively.

I realize I need to take a chill pill and he learned I just want to be heard and know that he is not blowing me off. Crazy how that works, huh?

We also learned I have a minor trust issue. No, I do not think he has lied to me, but I have a quest for the truth, I can sense when something is off with him and just have this need to know what that is. Wrong, eh, selfish, duh!

Yes, its my own selfish desire to be in control and know all that often leads to an argument, or my nagging tendency. I just want to know what is going on with him so I am not in the dark. Whereas, he is just protecting me from the junk that he deems unimportant to bring home to our relationship.

Point is, how do you fight and do you fight fair? Its something worth talking about with your spouse, significant other, heck your friends. We all communicate differently, but as long as you both know its coming from a place of love, itll be alright.

Top Hat or Tiara?

Well, its officially official, we are having a girl. Ballerinas, bows and tiaras, oh my!

In other news, it snowed in Texas, albeit rather briefly. So what did I do? Stand outside in a wedding dress and take bridal pics! Here is a sneak peak

I then proceeded to snuggle for the rest of the weekend underneath copious blankets and puppies. This is a short week for me, as I head to Orlando Thursday for our firmwide retreat. I am excited to meet more lawyers from our firm, learn a lot and perhaps catch a few warm rays of sunshine. Happy Monday ya'll!

Confessional Friday

It's Friday, its gender reveal day and well its freezing cold, but who cares! So let's get to confessing.

I confess....

• I 80% know the gender of the baby, but wait til after 5:30 today and check facebook and instagram for the announcement. If not see ya back here Monday for the blog reveal.
• I may never go back to normal jeans after maternity jeans.
• Three weeks to the wedding!
• Baby W likes Starbuck's cookies at 3pm during the day.
• The next couple weeks will fly by since I am in Orlando next week for the firm retreat and then Turkey Day and then Wedding Day!!
• I cannot decide if I want a wedding program. Thoughts?
• I have no clue what jewelry I am going to wear for said wedding.
• I wish we had eloped.
• Puppies in sweaters are the best thing ever.
• Scandel rocked my socks last night.
• HTGAWM did not rock so much said socks from above.
• Document review has grown on me.
• I have the cutest gender reveal planned ever... it will be.... legendary!

Happy Friday ya'll!

Hamburger Soup

So, its called hamburger soup, but its not really hamburger per se... I think it got the name from the fact that you use "hamburger meat." But alas, it warm, hardy, and super easy.

Ingredients

2-1/2 pounds Ground Chuck ( I use ground turkey)

1/2  Large Onion, Diced

2 stalks Celery, Diced

3 cloves Garlic, Minced

1 can (14.5 Ounce) Can Whole Tomatoes

3 cups Beef Stock Or Beef Broth, Plus More As Needed

3 whole Bell Peppers, Seeded And Diced (can use different colors, and I often omit these and  squash and zucchini)

4 whole Carrots, Peeled And Sliced On The Diagonal

5 whole Red Potatoes, Cut Into Chunks

3 Tablespoons Tomato Paste

1/2 teaspoon Kosher Salt (more To Taste)

1/2 teaspoon Black Pepper, More To Taste

2 teaspoons Dried Parsley Flakes

1/2 teaspoon Ground Oregano

1/4 teaspoon Cayenne Pepper (more To Taste)

Put all this stuff in the crockpot and set on low for 8-10 hours. If it looks dry add in more broth or for thicker stew like quality add in corn starch.

Super easy, super yummy!

The Weather Outside

It's not frightful per se, but what happened to Fall? It went from Fall to Winter here in .1 seconds. As in went to bed in the 70's woke up to a wind chill of 29! Yikes!

However, I do enjoy the addition of tights to my wardrobe, Yes I love a dress with tights and boots, Just, tights with a small baby bump is interesting. I tried to just size up, but then the rest of the tights  bunched at my ankles and knee. And the maternity ones are just too big at the top right now. So i'll take bunched over saggy bottoms.

I also love that addition of the scarf into my everyday attire. I love them in all shapes, sizes, colors and patterns. I would much rather wear a scarf than a necklace, plus it keeps my a tad warmer in the office chill. I am  huge fan of the large infinity scarf and the blanket scarf (as soon as I find a good one).

No bump update this week, as not much has changed around these bump parts. 17 weeks and feeling fine. We will finally reveal the sex of our little onion (yes the size of an onion this week, thank you bump.com) this weekend. It's been killing me not to tell you all!

Well, that's all around these parts for today. I'll be back tomorrow with a wonderful and hearty fall crock pot meal.

Vanilla or Chocolate?

So le fiancé and I began pre-marital counseling last night. We both wanted to do this so that we could be as prepared as possible to enter into the covenant of marriage. We are thrilled to have wonderful mentors in a married couple in our small group, and the husband will be officiating our wedding. It’s such a great way to open up and truly enter into this stage of our lives with Christ at the center.

Our first session was filled with telling our life story highlighting the most significant and important relationships. I had 15 minutes. 15 minutes? Are you crazy? How was I supposed to fit 32 intense years into 15 minutes? Where do I start? How do I explain where I came from, what I endured, and how I came out on the other side—in 15 minutes. What do I highlight? What do I keep out? What were truly the defining relationships and moments in my life? Think about it. How would you do this? What events and people truly shaped you whether in your walk with Christ or in life in general?

Needless to say, my story took a tad more than 15 minutes. As I sat there and opened up, I realized I had told so many parts of this story so many times that it wasn’t hard. I wasn’t embarrassed or ashamed. Le fiancé knew it all. The couple in front of us knew some of the sordid details, but I was among family, so the words flowed freely. I think everyone else was more exhausted listening than I was telling it. When I finished, it was good for me to know that nothing was new to le fiancé’s ears.

And then he began what he described as his more “vanilla” story. Ya know the old, grew up in the mid-west, two parents, house, one brother, dad built the family business variety. Its strange to hear the vast differences in our childhoods. As I sat there I envied him. How I longed for vanilla. For a house and meals on the table with my family and vacations and well ya know, the so-called American Dream.

Then I realized, my chocolate, vanilla, rocky-road of a life was unique. Each moment, each obstacle, challenge, triumph was for a reason. It shaped me, molded me—it was each of the significant events and people that led me to Him and him.

Had I not experienced each of those things my path would have led me elsewhere. I would be a different person—a different story. This marriage is the merging of chocolate and vanilla into a totally new flavor that we get to build together. It will be a mix of both of our lives, and our stories are just a chapter in the book we now get to write together as a married couple.

So, I thank my lucky stars and my Savior in heaven every day for allowing me to walk in light and darkness, for the struggles and obstacles, for the opportunity to live this crazy, mixed up, wonderful life that I have lived for the past 32 years because it has led me here. I am so happy to get the chance to start anew and have my happily ever after Winter Wonderland.

FROGS

Busy busy busy. My weekend was busy. Saturday began with visiting the wedding venue to do some layout and last minute table arranging etc... It was so cool to see the site set up for another wedding and just begin to get a feel for how the wedding will look.

Then it was off to the salon for a much-needed hair session. I have not seen my girl since July! July people. And let me tell you, nothing feels better than fresh color and a cut. I knew I wanted to keep my hair the same for the wedding, but  man it had been forever since I had trimmed those ends, and my preggo vitamins had caused quite some growth!

I am not fresh and fabulous and ready for the nuptials.

Then we headed out to the TCU/KSU game. We blacked out the stadium and it was awesome.

It was also our "Pink Out" game, hence the pink pom-poms. It was such a good game, and we came out victorious! I would also like to thank A&M for beating Auburn to help the Frogs out.

Sunday was just a hard day to do much. I woke up feeling less than stellar and just could not get to church. We opted to walk to get breakfast. My throat is just scratchy and my body just wants to sleep. I finally drug myself our for a short 2 mile run, then immediately plopped back down for nap. It was just all I could do to get myself to our first session of pre-marriage counseling.

I finally plopped back into bed about 10:30 and just was not ready for this morning. Here's to Monday!

Confessional Friday

Happy weekend everyone! Let's get to confessing!

I confess....

• I am wearing maternity jeans to work. Yes, I can still "fit" into my regular ones with the help of a belly band, but man these are so much more comfortable. Sexy? eh....
• I am finally getting a hair cut this weekend after too many months to count.
• I know the sex of our baby and I am making you all wait another week!
• Its one month until the wedding and I am only freaking out about my dress.
• All I want to do tomorrow is sleep all day, but I have wedding to-dos, hair to-dos and TCU takes on K-State.
• Everything I have on today is new!! Maternity jeans and top and cute booties from Sole Society! I know a photo would be nice, but that requires me to prepare in advance.

Happy Weekend ya'll!

One Month

Its here. The one month mark. In one short month I will marry the love of my life and become a Winter.

The past three months have flown by. Between job changing, wedding planning, baby planning I have barely had time to think let alone enjoy the process. However, I did enjoy cake last night. Cake tasting is just wonderful. All the options of flavors, fillings and icing. Yum. But, seeing as its a month away, I picked some flavors and moved on.

Here's to the last month of being at the beginning of the alphabet!

Backwards

So I never planned to get pregnant before I was married or get married while pregnant. I was trying to do things in the "correct" order. But then there was that fateful day when my doctor told me I was pregnant. I cried.

Yes you all I cried my eyes out. Not because I was scared, though I was, but because this was something I had wanted for so long. If you have been around these parts for a while or followed my blog before the change you know I was married before. And M and I tried to get pregnant. We did not avail. My body was against me. I was on chlomid and it just didn't work. I simply would not ovulate. Looking back now, I can see a small miracle at work. Shortly after round 5 of chlomid M and I were over. Do I blame the stress of trying, no. We were just not meant to be.

But, there I was 30 and convinced I would never have the one thing I wanted the most: a family.

Fast forward a year and half and there I was in my same doctor's office and he was telling me, after three tests, I was getting the greatest gift.

Sure there were pangs of oh no and what will people say. And the obligatory "knocked up" "shotgun wedding" smirks. But you know what? This is my life and this baby was made with the utmost love. Sure we fast-forwarded our timeline a tad, but the thing is, we are more in love and more in tune with each other now then ever.

So who is to say that doing things backwards is well, backwards. We are loved, in love and love this baby. And that folks is all I need.

Your Voice

Today is election day. Yes that day when you should head to the polls and have your voice heard. My motto, no vote, no voice, no reason for you to complain.

Hello Fall

Nothing beats the feel of crisp air on a morning dog walk. Yes, it's the sign that fall has finally arrived in Texas.

So, of course I donned my leggings and over-sized sweater, and found a wonderful lifetime movie to surpass the time. And then the TCU game came on. Talk about a heart attack! I love my Horned Frogs, but man do we have to win like that? But hey, a W is a W, so on to Kansas State.

I do have to stop and pause today as well. Heaven has received an angel. My should-be sis grandfather Daddy C passed away last week. I attended the visitation yesterday and man it was hard. He was the best surrogate grandfather to everyone. He just adopted all of my friend's friends and it just worked. He lived a long and wonderful life and I know he is watching over all of his grandkids.

And I have no exciting Halloween news or pics. Yup, boring people over here. We had burgers to celebrate a friend's birthday and called it a night. But next year, its on with the cuteness of baby costumes.

I did manage to tie up some wedding loose ends like flowers and linens Saturday. I was in and out of both places in less than an hour. Yup, that's how you do wedding on a timeline. Walk in, tell them i need x number of x types of flowers in whatever you got in purple and be on your way! Call me crazy, but just do not see the need to him and haw over the perfect bouquet or boutonniere. Just not worth it to me. I'll him and haw over cake. lol.

So that's the weekend in a pictureless nutshell! Oh... and did I mention I had a sonogram Friday? Did I mention the nurse is 80% sure she knows what it is? Did I mention I am not telling until November 14th?

Happy November ya'll